Saturday, October 30, 2010

The New Beginning(/s)

Hello dear readers!

Today's post is going to be super special.... and I'll tell you why in just a moment, but before that, here's some housekeeping stuff:
*Check our this super cool post on the positivity blog - 7 Powerful Fundamentals-Wisdom from the old Greeks (I think its great)
*A few nights ago I found (with my brothers help of course) a pure Sarabhloh Kara, that I am loving so much now! Like wearing that kara really made me teary at first, b/c it feels so original, and b/c of something totally unknown to my own self- as soon as I wore it, my inner voice said, "Sometimes God bestows so much love to you that you have nothing to do but to cry" (I know, right, I'm a bit silly, but I really think I was not very deserving of any of it at the first place, so it is a big deal for really is!) And it is not my first kara, but still its cool- at least to me!
*A few days ago, I was in a bus, and I closed my eyes to get my my meditative self, to realize and appreciate the light of God in all, and for that brief moment, there was no hobo, no smoker, no stinky person, no brand name clad people, they were all just God... Gods light shone in every individual- The world is beautiful, everyone is lovely, because God loves us all, He made us all!

Alright, now the special post--- Well it is special b/c I am dedicating this post to my cousin and her husband who are expecting their first child in a few months! (you know who you are!!! sweet heart!)

Well, first, I want you both to know that you have, throughout your lives, inspired me a lot! Jiju and dee, (as I call the two of you!) I am so happy for you, and I want you both to know that even though I have not seen the 2 of you for over 4 years, you still hod a special place in my heart. Jiju, I took a promise from you, on the day of your wedding, I told you that I'd want you to keep dee happy forever and love her till eternity; I thought over it several times, I know I was very silly and kiddish back then; but you certainly were not. You kept your promise. Through ups and downs, through periods of illness, through times of hardship, you've always supported dee... which showed me, that you are her Prince Charming and you were made for her. I can now, always look at you both and convince myself, that there is love in the world, and that no matter what might be the situation, if you are with the one you love, you'll walk thorough the crisis and times of test, with grace. You know what jiju, that is why every-time I am on phone with you, I am so happy, b/c you are a lovely person, and you've made dee's life so colorful (I'm sure!)
Okay! So, I'm gonna share this one video that we watched in one of my classes that I love. Its lovely, because Every-time I watch the video, the thoughts that are running around in my head are those of Sikhi's perspective to childbirth...which I really think I believe in
So as Sikhs, we believe that a baby in the womb of a mother is (like we believe for every atomic particle of matter) vibrating in the intensity of naad, or Shabad Guru; which means that a fetus is like every other thing, facing the harsh conditions it is in, by resonating on naam or in other words is in Meditation.... (remember Brownian motion in every particle of an atom from science classes- the reason behind that is God, who made everything and mantains it all- God is a power/ infinite energy source...). We also believe that when the baby comes to the outside world, Maya (anything that distracts one from God) slaps it and from then on a human being has to choose for himself, whether he wants to radiate the light of God or not! and the idea is that every individual ha that light, the JYOT of God, but only a few, by meditating on it can radiate it....
Well thats what I think when I watch the video and in general, thats what I believe; and that is why, we are all souls, departed from the original light of God, and we all come to the world to take the test, that Maaya throws our way, and we've gotta shine out of it all, by just realizing who we are- just part of the divine!
Most mums would meditate and do paath for the most part of this time, to welcome the new soul! Its such a blessing that we will be receiving a soul in our family soon... I'll pray and meditate, and thank Guru jee, and God for blessing our family with the little one! I can't wait to hear the news, and more than that I can't wait to hold my little Nephew/ Niece in my hands, and feel the light of God! Everything will be good, dee and jiju! I'll pray for you!

Alright, so for the video, I wanna mention that it has Nudity, and some scientific facts, but I find it interesting!
If you think its too long to watch, don't, but its really cool!


have a good night!
Love and light!

Sunday, October 24, 2010

Purple Cows!

Just went out for a walk, and took some pictures of the flowers.... In my favorite colors- pink and purple!!! 
While walking, I was flipping through the pages of this one book I often go back to... I came across something worth sharing:

There is no true celebration of who we are unless there is, first acceptance of [our God Given things, that we have little or no control over]. We must embrace the boundaries and borders of our birth, as well as the opportunities to actualize our wishes and dreams. Celebration is a careful balance.
Celebration is not a declaration of invincibility or omnipotence. On the contrary, what we celebrate is being human. We celebrate all that it is being a human- the tears of sorrow and joy,the extraordinary accomplishments, the ordinary failures, the courage to meet the challenge, the wisdom to ask for help, the soaring of youth, the settling of adulthood, and the marvelous melting of old age  . We embrace and celebrate it all.
If we are to be fully capable of love, we must be ready to celebrate who we are. We must like ourselves. We must know ourselves. We must trust and respect ourselves. We must find ourselves worthy of love and respect. We must believe ourselves to be admirable. 
When we know we are loveable, we are free to love. When we freely love life becomes a celebration....
- Pastor William R. Grimbol- The Grace of Love, Meditations and prayers

Oh well, Sometimes, I look through my shelf of memories, and read the poems and essays I wrote as a kid... and somehow, I'd always re-read this one essay I wrote, about myself in a class and I remember that interestingly, most people found it really hard to even write a paragraph about themselves, and here I was, writing a full interesting essay, really only defining who I am....
and the most remarkable thing is, that as a 10 year old I knew that "I live only to serve my passions and feed my curiosities".... and that it still holds true... I do live somehow, (maybe even selfishly,) only for myself...

I've decided never to call myself a 'Failure' or a 'Big Fat Zero' in Sikhi or in Spirituality, for that matter....just because I am not.... I fancy self criticizing to a level that it interferes with who I am-  which I cannot let it do....

So I'm gonna go review my Genetics Notes, and finish having my dinner, You guys, have a good night!
And just indulge in whatever you love....

hmmmm.....I love bubble blowing, Really, and maybe I'll find an old video of me and my friends doing that, and literally, I remember in the video, I was laughing at the top of my lungs if the bubbles would pop on my face because of the wind... Oh crazy times!
Oh and that reminds me, this one time, Like in first year I had a late night Chemistry exam, and I did really bad at it, and it was a stormy night, no one was out in the streets, and me and one of my other friends, screamed on the top of our lungs, in the middle of the street, just to express how mad we were at our professor for making such a hard test... For some reason, those times when I do the craziest things in the world, keep coming back to me in my memory, just when they need to be repeated...I wanna be doing crazy things more often! Maybe next time I'll tell you some stories of my crazy times... so funny...!

Have a good night!
Love and light....

Monday, October 18, 2010

Guru Jee is never ever-ever-ever-ever ever gonna give up on me!

I've been super busy with my midterms and so there's a really long post, still in process that I will be posting once I am done my last exam that is on Wednesday.

In the meantime, I wanted to share with you, something really cool that I happened to 'feel' in meditation (not really a meditative mode, but something like that) last night....
So, Last night, I got into my bed really late after finishing my exam prep., it was actually Amrit Vela already, b/c it must've been 2 or 3 am in the morning anyway. And I was still humming the tunes of some meditative style kirtan, and I started to do my kirtan Sohila in my head. Generally, if I have a bani memorized, I sing it in my head like a Nursery Rhyme with gestures, just like little kids do... I tend to still find myself lost in terms of Spirituality, but I think thats what my head was yielding...Generally I call it mental diarrhea, when you really want to concentrate and meditate on a bani, and live that moment in the Guru's word... and you are explicitly trying by singing it to yourself like a little baby, doing gestures explaining the words you understand, to yourself... So my mental Diarrhea, I remember, was pooping thoughts like Sim, you're so successful in everything, you got such a decent job, you got all the resources you need, you're the most cheerful, outgoinmg and perhaps the happiest person out there, you are such a cool kid; but in Guru jee's house, in Spirituality- and for once I dare use the term faithfulness, you are a big fat Zero... you...blah you blah... I don't even know...
Laying in my bed, in the dark, all by myself, I remember I was still singing my Kirtan Sohila, and trying to concentrate, but I was contemplating some thoughts on how I am socially very admirable in my Academic and professional circles, but I have been unknowingly (until that point) avoiding Sangat, I can't anymore, get myself to socialize with the 'holy people'/ members of our Congregation, even if they are very friendly... For some reason I've been feeling as if I do not belong with them and that I always behave Socially Awkward when I am in the Sangat, when asked a little question, I start giving endless speeches, when told to do something, I start feeling like I'm the boss of all... I don't know, I'm not like everyone else out there...they are way too humble, way too simple and way too faithful... or lets say, I'm just too much of a Fashion-ista, & just too much of an egoist... I don't know!
And while my mental thoughts were slapping me in the face, telling me that I totally do not belong to the Guru's house, I do not love Him enough to call myself His Sikh, and that I am not good enough....I suddenly, for no apparent reason threw my head back and started staring up at the blinds of my window, where very little faint diffused light was entering into my room, from somewhere very far... and I remeber I was almost on the last Shabad (Stanza) of the Sohila Sahib, Raag Gauri Poorbi Mahalla Panjwa,....  and all that mental diarrhea- those shitty houghts stopped, and for a few moments all I could hear was the part of my head saying... "Karoh Bainanti, sunoh mere meeta, Sant tehal ki baila...... ..."
Listen, my friends, I beg of you: now is the time to serve the Saints! 
In this world, earn the profit of the Lord's Name, and hereafter, you shall dwell in peace. ((1))
and my multi tasking head (still singing Sohila sahib) cooked up another thought, It said & I clearly remember, Sim, you are a very difficult child, a child who makes endless mistakes on this path, you are really very difficult, very ridiculous, you don't really deliver your Spritual duties well, you  fail at Rehit, you fail at doing Nitnem, you fail at Sikhi, you might be a big fat Zero in Spirituality; but trust me, Guru jee, your Pita jee (Father) Maharaaj, is never ever ever ever ever ever ever ever gonna let go of you, He's never ever ever gonna give up on you.
And warm  tears suddenly started to roll down my eyes.
 (its not even funny I remember noticing how warm my tears are!)
And I know that this was my inner voice, I hear it often and I know is not Supernatural, I do not claim that....but I know that my inside believes in God's love and knows very well that My Guru jee is holding my hand, while I am struggling to climb up this cliff; and He will never let go of me, He will not let me fall and break all my bones
...and I sang..."Antarjaami Purakh Bidhatey, Sarda Man Ki Pooray ; Nanak Daas Ehai Sukh maangai moko kar Santan ki Dhoorey... Moko kar Santan Ki dhoorey..."
O Inner-knower, Searcher of Hearts, O Primal Being, Architect of Destiny: please fulfill this yearning of my mind.
 Nanak, Your slave, begs for this happiness: let me be the dust of the feet of the Saints. ((4)(5))