Okay it happened!

 They say that if you feel inspired to do something, say to the universe what you wanna do, and then the How will be revealed to you...

like I said yesterday, Speak what you seek till you see what you saught...

So I said to you, the universe, yesterday that amongst other things- I want to become a gurbani educator. And I put out the intention with ideas of what this would look like. So, today I came across a video that sorta gave me the idea- this shoild look like Essays! Written essays & Video essays....

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lML0ndFlBuc

I have ideas, many of them.... but yes. I am gonns do this,,,, and 365 of them, one for each day of the 

Gurbani educator- I shall be

One of my hearts longings is to become a Gurbani educator. And so I am challenging msyelf to post Gurbani concept of the day for at least 365 posts one for each day of the year. During Covid, I did that in my instagram stories, it gathered some traction and people liked my work, but I think I did it too informally and didn't create good recordings/ archives of them, so I wanna start this thing again and do it well this time... I want to write it out and speak it out make it good. I may also record them and create content around gurbani education because that's how I will meet my goal of becoming a gurbani educator- and theres very few women in this field so I wanna step up, fill the void- that exists within my heart and the community. My personal hope is that it will help me get closer to Guru Sahib and actually become the thing that transforms my own sikhi before it transforms others'- but hey, I certainly want this work to have an impact. These Gurbani concepts will be all based in gurbani, might speak of things grinding my gears, or gurbani pangtees that are rocking my world or evoking certain feelings or helping me cope with life as we know it. It may be like sehaj paath or nitnem diaries or journalling feelings aroused by gurbani. It may entail pearls of wisdom that gurbani shares with us, or a commentary of the state of the world/ culture/ issues, based in gurbani. There may be stories or quotes or ideas that come from other palces, but will always be for understaning gurbani better or having gurbani help us reconcile with what we see. It may be santhyaa ideas and why they matter. It will be many things, but many things gurbani. That is my intention. So here we go- I shall speak what I seek until I see what I saught.  

And so it shall be, in the name of Nanak Guru Gobind Singh Ji Pooran Guru Avtaar. Nanak Naam Chardikalla Tere Bhaney Sarbat da Bhalla. 

Moving Target

 I turn 35 this week! 

It's been a long time since I have posted here. I sorta abandoned this blog in my mid 20s, I think. I was onto journeys and terrains where time was scarce, and motivation to keep up with it ran dry, and that was okay, good or excellent even at times. ... because life is about prioritization and re-prioritization, from time to time. I do stop by here every now and then, knowing this is a body of work (if you'd call it that), that once had an audience it reached, now serves as an archival journal to my early Sikhi days. It is rather comforting to come here and publish something quick - a safe fold of the many infinite pages in the mega-multiverse that is the Internet, safer and more out of reach than my rather popular Instagram profile- or really anywhere. Like the shoulder of an invisible friend - perhaps the ultimate friend- the one who has witnessed it all- who has dreamt my dreams with me, who has lived through each moment of my life with me, in me, taken steps in my steps, worked with me, through me, my hands, my body and my soul. (& for that matter, You- the rare reader!) 

ਸਰਬ ਭੂਤ ਆਪਿ ਵਰਤਾਰਾ ॥ Sarab bẖūṯ āp varṯārā. In all forms, He Himself is pervading.

ਸਰਬ ਨੈਨ ਆਪਿ ਪੇਖਨਹਾਰਾ ॥ Sarab nain āp pekẖanhārā. Through all eyes, He Himself is watching.

Preetam!

Anyhow, to speak to you, like leaning on Preetm's shoulder, 

I'm swollen with many thoughts today, eager to spill out and overflow, the heaviest of them all, is that of overwhelming gratitude. 

35 

And though I have not authored a single poem in the last 5 years... I have moved to a different continent, become a vastly different person, the anchor is still in you. My shores still rise and fall to the beat of your breath.

ਹਮ ਤੁਮ ਬੀਚੁ ਭਇਓ ਨਹੀ ਕੋਈ ॥ Ham ṯum bīcẖ bẖa▫i▫o nahī ko▫ī. Between You and I, there is no other.

ਤੁਮਹਿ ਸੁ ਕੰਤ ਨਾਰਿ ਹਮ ਸੋਈ ॥੩॥ Ŧumėh so kanṯ nār ham so▫ī. ||3|| You are the Husband Lord, and I am the soul-bride. ||3||

And the only prayer is that May I always be yours forever, without fail. May I always just reside in your Charan Kamal. In your meditation, your remembrance and beholding in your presence.

ਭਜਸ ਤੁਅੰ ॥

(Lord,) I meditate on you

ਭਜਸ ਤੁਅੰ ॥

(Lord,) I meditate on you

ਰਟਸ ਤੁਅੰ ॥

(Lord,) I repeat your name

ਠਟਸ ਤੁਅੰ ॥੧੫॥੬੫॥

(Lord,) I intuitively remember you ॥15||65||

ਜਿਮੀ ਤੁਹੀ ॥

you are the earth

ਜਮਾ ਤੁਹੀ ॥

You are the Sky!

ਮਕੀ ਤੁਹੀ ॥

You are the landlord

ਮਕਾ ਤੁਹੀ ॥੧੬॥੬੬॥

You are the house itself

ਅਭੂ ਤੁਹੀ ॥

You are birthless

ਅਭੈ ਤੁਹੀ ॥

You are fearless

ਅਛੂ ਤੁਹੀ ॥

You are untouchable

ਅਛੈ ਤੁਹੀ ॥੧੭॥੬੭॥

You are Invincible!

ਜਤਸ ਤੁਹੀ ॥

You are the definition of celibacy/ Purity

ਬ੍ਰਤਸ ਤੁਹੀ ॥

You are the means for a virtuous deed!

ਗਤਸ ਤੁਹੀ ॥

you are salvation

ਮਤਸ ਤੁਹੀ ॥੧੮॥੬੮॥

You are redemption

ਤੁਹੀ ਤੁਹੀ ॥

You Are! You Are!

ਤੁਹੀ ਤੁਹੀ ॥

You Are! You Are!

ਤੁਹੀ ਤੁਹੀ ॥

You Are! You Are!

ਤੁਹੀ ਤੁਹੀ ॥੧੯॥੬੯॥

You Are! You Are!

ਤੁਹੀ ਤੁਹੀ ॥

You Are! You Are!

ਤੁਹੀ ਤੁਹੀ ॥

You Are! You Are!

ਤੁਹੀ ਤੁਹੀ ॥

You Are! You Are!

ਤੁਹੀ ਤੁਹੀ ॥੨੦॥੭੦॥

You Are! You Are!

And You have been so kind, blessed me with your Charan Kamal to lean on. One who changed it all. Thank You! Dhan Guru Nanak! The sincerity, the meditation and the medicine, the triad I always sought. He's a medicine man. I see it in his beautiful eyes. Remember, I always said that the purpose of my life is to Heal, Empower and Support people. You blessed me with him and he did precisely that, to me. You bless us all. Its all you! 'Tis all good, 'This all Guru!

In your name, Guru Ram Das, all needs are always met. 

The targets of ego are moving target.

And there is always more to do, better to perform, deficiencies to accept and correct, lessons to be learned, redemption to be sought and worked for. 

Children to rear, patients to serve, assets to be accumulated, Seva to do. 

And yet, you are the doer in it all. 

And in You, Preetam, there's just tuning in and nothing else.  

Thank you, Preetam for it all. 

The moto 

"Good, better, best. Never let it rest. Till your good is better, and your better is best."

comes to mind, the ego mind... 

and then I tune in to You, plug into you, and find true freedom, Preetam.

 

Thank you for everything. 

It felt good to talk to you here today!